This is a question I get often as a counselor and one I even wrestled with when I was single. It is not one that can not be easily answered with a simple yes or no. Before I share my opinion on the topic, we will have to take into account cultural norms about marriage including when it should happen and what it means to the culture when someone is single or married etc. Before I answer the question here are some reason why I think some people do not get married:

  1. Focused on school and career.
  2. Have emotional and spiritual issues that prevent them from finding a mate or committing to a mate.
  3. Have unrealistic expectations.
  4. Do not know how to be pursued or pursue a woman.
  5. They have believed lies about marriage that keep them from committing.
  6. Timing.
  7. Generational curses and spiritual hindrances.

This is connected to a previous blog I wrote concerning “The One“. I believe that God brings people that are eligible and it is our job to choose them based on biblical standards, core values, and goals, etc. What does that mean?
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You may have had someone who was a perfect match for you, but due to whatever reason you did not get married, that doesn’t mean no one will come around. According to the CIA factbook, the ratio of men to women right now between 25 and 55 is one to one, so there is a great chance that he or she is out there.

So why do some people not get married?

Besides the reasons I mentioned above, I do know people who really have no desire for marriage, nothing is wrong with them psychologically, they have simply been given the gift of celibacy and they find fulfillment and joy in serving the Lord and other people. These people most of the times have never  had a desire to be married.

Now how about the ones who desire to be married and are not? I believe that God is a good father, he will not give us desires for something that is beautiful and his design and then just dangle it like a carrot for us to never achieve. What I have seen is that most people who desire marriage and have godly motives towards marriage, have worked out any emotional and faulty beliefs and are walking in purpose eventually get married.

Now you can get married with all those issues, but it is best to make sure you deal with you until the one comes. Do not settle, focus on God, and walk in purpose and sooner or later you will find someone walking alongside you.